7 Practical Tips That Will Help Fix Your Marriage When It Is Broken:
If your marriage is broken and you do not live together as a couple anymore, either in the same house, or even if your partner has moved out, there are a few ways in which you can try and make your marriage work. Here are some practical tips that can help you salvage a broken marriage:
1. Do not panic:
No one wants to be in a broken marriage, but such things do happen. The first thing you have to keep in mind is to not panic. You may or may not have anticipated this phase in your marriage, but now that it is here, you will have to act to make it work, instead of panicking and losing out on crucial time. Panicking will prevent you from thinking clearly and you might act out and end up adversely affecting your relationship.
Keeping your mind calm and thinking clearly will help you understand the situation at hand better.
2. Do not think of punishing your partner:
The thought of a broken marriage upsets everyone. If your partner has initiated a breakup, and you want to punish him for the same, do not. Now is the time when you should avoid all negative thoughts.
Your intentions should be completely focused on finding a solution and reaching an amicable situation where both you and your partner can try and live together again happily. If you want to hurt or punish your partner, it will only mean that both of you will move away from one another, and might never patch up again.
3. Listen to the complaints:
You may feel that you have been the best partner your spouse could have asked for, and you may have genuinely tried to be as well. But if your partner has left you or is planning to leave you, chances are, you must have done something that led your partner to take such a step.
Speak to your partner and try to understand what the other side of the story is. When you really make an effort to ask your partner about the reasons that led to ending the marriage, your partner may tell you things that you never realized you did. Pay attention and listen to your partner.
4. Understand what your partner needs:
Once you make an attempt to reach out to your partner, there will be some things that your partner will specifically tell you. He may not tell you all of it and leave some things unspoken.
Understand what your partner’s most important and basic needs are. For instance, if you were always busy with work or chores, your partner may have felt unloved and may need more love and attention. Or perhaps you never gave your partner much importance and your partner needs respect from you. Whatever your partner’s needs, find out a way in which you can fulfill those and show your partner how you plan to work it out if you give yourselves another chance.
5. Prove your worth:
This is that one time in your relationship when your actions and the way you behave would speak much more than you can actually tell your partner. Understand that at this stage, your partner is very upset, hurt, and vulnerable. Whatever you say at this stage can have a make or break effect on your marriage.
So whatever you do now will have to be nothing but the best you can do. Be the person with whom he had fallen in love. For instance, your partner complains that you never gave enough time at home. Now that you want to make your marriage work, you tell your partner that you will make sure you are home every day at a definite time. But instead of just saying so, start doing it. Make that effort and start coming home around the time you promised, even if your partner has moved out of the house and is not living with you for the moment.
6.Speak out your heart:
Now is the time to say all that you truly feel for your partner, and be as honest and yourself as you can ever be. You may or may not have been good at communicating with each other in the past while you were together, but if you do not make a big effort now, chances are you will never get another opportunity to do so.
Tell your partner why you need him or her in your life and what your partner means to you. Express your love and your need for your partner in as many ways as you can. Tell your partner why you think he or she is special and tell them you love them. If you genuinely want to save your marriage from breaking, your partner will see the love and dedication in your words and things will eventually fall in place.
7.Start as strangers:
A good way to restart your marriage and give it a second shot is to try and start afresh. Instead of repeating the same things over and over again, you could try and meet each other as strangers and let things take their own course. To make it interesting and neutral at the same time, offer to meet your partner at some relaxed and comfortable setting.
Approach your partner and introduce yourself. Make sure you pay enough attention to your partner, just as you would pay attention to someone you are meeting for the first time and are interested in. Remember, this is not just a game but a very important way to bring your marriage back together, so you have to give it your best.
A marriage is a commitment that two people make to each other, but these days, many marriages are falling apart. Instead of wondering what went wrong, try to bring some positive changes in your marriage before it is too late. And if you do reach a stage where it looks as if your marriage is about to break, work on it and let your partner know what the marriage means to you.
Moms, if you have any practical tips to share, do tell us in the comments below
